As women in leadership roles or high-pressure careers, many of us have faced situations where our expertise is questioned—even when we've clearly proven our worth. These moments can feel frustrating, personal, and even demoralizing. But instead of letting them shake your confidence, you can turn them into opportunities to demonstrate your value and reinforce your authority.
Below are 10 actionable tips, each connected to a real-life scenario, to help you navigate these moments with confidence and clarity.
1. Lead With Facts
When someone questions your expertise, presenting evidence from your track record can quickly shift the conversation.
Story:
During a strategy meeting, I proposed an approach based on a project I had led successfully in the past. A team member interjected, questioning whether the method was relevant. I calmly responded, “In a similar project last year, we used this exact strategy and increased engagement by 40%. Here’s how I see it working for us now.” The room quieted as the data spoke for itself.
Example Response:
“I’ve led similar initiatives successfully in the past, and I’m confident that my expertise will help us achieve our goals here as well.”
2. Ask Clarifying Questions
Sometimes, the best way to handle skepticism is to invite constructive input.
Story:
I once had a board member repeatedly push back on my suggestions. Rather than reacting defensively, I asked, “What specific concerns do you have about this approach?” It turned out their hesitation came from a misunderstanding about the timeline, not the idea itself. Addressing their concerns upfront allowed us to move forward collaboratively.
Example Response:
“What specific concerns do you have about this approach? I’d love to address them and ensure we’re aligned.”
3. Use Data to Support Your Points
When opinions clash, let the numbers do the talking.
Story:
During a budget review, I proposed reallocating funds to a new initiative. Someone questioned the potential ROI. I came prepared with a detailed report showing how similar efforts had tripled ROI in comparable cases. “Here’s the data that supports this decision,” I said. The conversation shifted from doubt to action.
Example Response:
“Here’s the data supporting this decision, and how it’s worked in similar scenarios. Let’s review it together.”
4. Reframe the Focus on Shared Goals
Keep the discussion centered on the bigger picture to minimize conflict.
Story:
In a team meeting, I faced pushback on a proposed restructuring plan. Instead of defending myself, I redirected the conversation: “The focus here is on improving client satisfaction. Based on my experience, this approach will help us achieve that.” By emphasizing our shared goal, I brought the team back on track.
Example Response:
“The focus here is achieving X. Based on my experience, I believe this approach gives us the best chance of success. Do you agree?”
5. Stay Calm and Confident
Your response under pressure often matters more than your words.
Story:
I was once publicly questioned during a presentation. Instead of reacting emotionally, I paused, took a deep breath, and replied, “I appreciate your perspective. Based on my expertise, I’m confident this approach will deliver results.” The calmness in my response defused the tension and reinforced my authority.
Example Response:
“I’m confident in my expertise and this strategy. I’ve seen it work effectively in similar situations.”
6. Prepare Responses in Advance
Having ready answers can help you respond gracefully in the moment.
Story:
When I first joined a leadership team, I noticed a pattern of subtle doubts about my decisions. I started keeping a list of anticipated questions and well-crafted responses on my phone. When someone asked, “Why do you think this will work?” I was ready with, “Here’s why: it’s a method I’ve successfully used multiple times in similar scenarios.” The preparedness paid off.
Example Response:
“I appreciate the feedback. Here’s why I believe this approach will work based on my prior experience.”
7. Redirect to the Bigger Picture
Shifting the focus away from yourself can neutralize criticism.
Story:
In a heated meeting about resource allocation, someone questioned my recommendation. I replied, “The ultimate goal is to maximize results with the resources we have. My recommendation is based on that priority.” Framing it around the team’s objectives shifted the energy in the room.
Example Response:
“The ultimate goal here is to drive results. I’m confident my experience can help us get there.”
8. Involve the Questioner in the Process
Turning skeptics into collaborators can shift the dynamic.
Story:
During a workshop I facilitated, a participant questioned my methodology. I said, “I’d love to hear your thoughts. How do you think this could be adapted for even better results?” Their perspective added value, and the questioning stopped.
Example Response:
“I’d love to hear your thoughts on this approach. How do you see it aligning with our goals?”
9. Reiterate Your Qualifications
Sometimes, a simple reminder of your credentials is enough.
Story:
While consulting for a new client, a senior leader doubted my recommendations. I responded, “As someone who has managed similar projects globally, I’m confident this is the right course of action.” The mention of my expertise shifted the tone of the discussion.
Example Response:
“As someone who has handled similar projects successfully, I feel confident this is the best course of action.”
10. Know When to Address It Privately
Persistent undermining may require a one-on-one conversation.
Story:
In one role, a colleague frequently contradicted me in meetings. I pulled them aside and said, “I’ve noticed some tension in our discussions. Can we talk about how we can better support each other moving forward?” The private conversation cleared the air and improved our working relationship.
Example Response:
“I’d like to discuss your concerns in more detail after this meeting. Let’s set up a time to talk.”
Why This Matters
Having your expertise questioned isn’t just frustrating—it can also undermine your confidence if you let it. However, each challenge offers an opportunity to assert your leadership, demonstrate your value, and build credibility.
Research highlights the prevalence of these situations: 66% of women in leadership report having their expertise questioned. With the strategies outlined above, you can handle these moments with poise and turn them into opportunities to reinforce your authority.
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